Whether you’re 6 or 60, there’s one thing everyone hates when going to the doctor; and no, it’s not getting pricked with needles. It’s waiting to get pricked with needles. Your appointment is at 2, but as 2, 2:05, 2:10 rolls by, you ruminate “I had an appointment. If the doctor wasn’t going to be available, why schedule at this time? Apparently, my time isn’t valuable.”

As our lives are perhaps more rushed than ever, waiting for any appointment or meeting is a hassle. However, a tardy counseling session is qualitatively worse than other late meetings. Getting started late is a broken promise in a relationship that needs trust in spades.

Recently, I’ve been thinking about the role of work in my life, as well as how I relate to work. This train of thought naturally leads to evaluating how well I am doing engaging with people (and myself) as more than a worker.

How much time and mental energy does my work take from me, or give to me?

How much of my drive and motivation does my work inspire?

These are a few of the questions I am asking in order to continue my mission for myself and other therapists: To live and work well.

What does it take to be a leader? Thousands of words have been written on the topic. Here’s the truth: there’s no magic formula.  But I do suggest three important elements to work on over time: Know yourself, know your purpose, and know your people. How to live that out will differ for every leader and every setting.